so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
