i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
