sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
