jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The air taste purple.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
