I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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