Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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