That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
This house was built for laser tag.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
