Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
