you win again, gameday.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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