i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
