I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
