Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
