there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
