Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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