I bet he comes in French.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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