is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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