you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
