Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
