pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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