Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
