I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
