Who did Billy Mays play for?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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