so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
