they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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