Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
