Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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