we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
