brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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