if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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