you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize