then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Randomize