She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
