You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm sobbing to NWA
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
