Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
