I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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