Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
