oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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