Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
