Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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