redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
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