It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
im drinking this country out of the recession.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
