there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
She announced her abortion via fbk
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize