I just cut my nipple shaving
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
