i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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