So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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