i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
They are going to name an STD after you.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
