Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
