Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
