Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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