i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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